Friday, November 8, 2019
3 Cases of Sentence-Composition Confusion
3 Cases of Sentence-Composition Confusion 3 Cases of Sentence-Composition Confusion 3 Cases of Sentence-Composition Confusion By Mark Nichol Itââ¬â¢s not only quite possible but also quite common for what initially appears to be a well-written sentence to turn out to fail to express what the writer intended. Readers may be able to understand that intent, and may not even notice the error, but confusion is likely. Here are three sentences that donââ¬â¢t quite say what the writer thinks they say, followed by discussions and revisions. 1. Jones teamed up with another future Hall of Famer named John Smith. This sentence literally states that Jonesââ¬â¢s name is actually John Smith; ââ¬Å"another future Hall of Famer named John Smithâ⬠implies that the previously mentioned person shares that name. To eliminate this distraction, simply replace name with a comma: ââ¬Å"Jones teamed up with another future Hall of Famer, John Smith. (Alternatively, change another to fellow and delete named: ââ¬Å"Jones teamed up with fellow future Hall of Famer John Smith.â⬠) 2. Gillian Anderson was offered half of David Duchovnyââ¬â¢s salary for the return of The X-Files. Here, the take-away is that half of David Duchovnyââ¬â¢s salary was taken away and offered to Gillian Anderson- obviously not the intended meaning, which is that Duchovny was paid twice as much as Anderson to return to the television series. The fact that Duchovnyââ¬â¢s salary is mentioned only for comparative purposes should be emphasized: ââ¬Å"Gillian Anderson was offered half of what David Duchovny was paid to return to The X-Files.â⬠(Alternatively, write ââ¬Å"Gillian Anderson was offered half as much as David Duchovny was paid to return to The X-Files.â⬠) Note, too, the rewording in each case of the end of the sentence, which originally was written as if to suggest that she gave the series back in exchange for taking half of Duchovnyââ¬â¢s salary, rather than that in exchange for reprising her role in a new edition of the series, she is earning half of what her male co-star is being paid. 3. I managed to pinpoint the location of his first housing development, but finding the first house he built was about as easy as locating men who worked on his construction crews. To compare one difficult task (finding the first house a housing developer built) with another (tracking down his contractors) by writing that one was as easy as the other could confuse readers. (As it is, only the counterpoint conjunction but provides a clue that the second and third objectives were a challenge to achieve.). For clarity, replace ââ¬Å"as easy asâ⬠with ââ¬Å"as difficult asâ⬠: ââ¬Å"I managed to pinpoint the location of his first housing development, but finding the first house he built was about as difficult as locating men who worked on his construction crews.â⬠Want to improve your English in five minutes a day? Get a subscription and start receiving our writing tips and exercises daily! Keep learning! Browse the Style category, check our popular posts, or choose a related post below:Wether, Weather, WhetherThe Writing ProcessDrama vs. Melodrama
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